Reasons why you should date Jeffrey Dahmer

– He really likes animals. 

-He’s a good cook. 

-He could bring you chocolate home

-If you were ever stabbed, he’d know if it hit any major organs

-He’s very loving 

-He is intelligent 

-He is good looking

-He could prepare you the perfect cut of meat 

-He’d always give attention and want your attention 

-He’d say cute things like “oh, I could just eat you up!” 

-He’s organized

-He likes Black Sabbath 

-He’s a sweet heart 

-He would have a lot of home videos to play at your wedding 

-He would build an alter to worship you

-He is sensual and sexual at the same time

-He dressed well 

-He was honest and caring 

-He’d always apologize when he was wrong 

-He’s tall 

-He could make you laugh

-He’d never leave you

-He’d always have plenty of meat in his fridge

-He would always want you to touch him/be intimate. 

-He knows all of the best clubs and bath houses 

But, sadly, prisoners decided to kill probably the most remorseful inmate in history. But his ghost should be very date-able. 


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